The Prez Drags Our Lord And Saviour Into The MESS That Is South African Politics

Remember when I told you a while ago to brace yourselves for the fuckery the 2014 general election was going to bring? Well shit just got real! The Mail & Guardian reports that Jacob Zuma has gone from enabling the crucifixion of our justice system (shown above by Zapiro), to apparently dragging our Lord Jesus crucified and holy into his MESS.

If this blog seems to be written by an incoherent drunk, it is because the M&G article is full of so much fucking bullshit presented as if it is nothing out of the ordinary, that my head is spinning…or maybe it’s from those horse tranquilizers I just snorted in celebration of 100 posts…nope, it’s from this bullshit.  First of all, those shameless whores at M&G mangled and butchered The Prez’s original quote about “running the government forever” into a title which is much more eye-catching, i.e., double-fisting the word Jesus into it. Then, there is this sentence in this complete attention-whore of an article:

Repeated corruption scandals, increasing crime levels, poverty, high unemployment levels and internal bickering are hurting the ANC’s popularity.

Hurting? HURTING?! The level of fuckery bitches in the ANC have shown to be capable of, should have done nothing less than destroy the party completely. The NERVE to then go “door to door” on an election campaign! This motherfucker should all enter RuPauls’ Drag Race, because he clearly all posses charisma, uniqueness, nerve and talent (as is required for entry):

C  harisma – Getting dumb hoes to listen to them even though everything falling out of their talking holes are filthy, STD-ridden LIES!

U  niqueness – Show me other “democratic” politicians who OPENLY practice polygamy, have been TO COURT for rape, has OPENLY admitted to gay bashing and who has been REPEATEDLY been accused of some kind of corruption.

N  erve – The NERVE to show your fucking face in public and ask for votes after all your messes.

T   alent – Incomparable talent for lying, stealing, cheating, beating, etc.

Yes, The Prez sure has the C-U-N-T he needs to get re-elected! Finally, this MESS of an article mentions that NUMSA has announced that it will not be backing the ANC in the coming elections. Dafuq? I don’t know too much about politics (or anything for that matter), but where do unions fit in? Aren’t unions supposed to be concerned with representing workers? Why would a trade union feel the need to openly back a political party…or announce that the won’t, in this case? SO MANY QUESTIONS! SO LITTLE ANSWERS!

So between the blatant whorring on M&G’s part, The Prez’s C-U-N-T and this NUMSA business I feel like I need a lie down…next to a bucket!




Daily Skid Marks


Eskom will continue fucking everyone around, according to Eskom. – via Mail & Guardian

It is always heartwarming to see TRUE justice being served. – via Times Live

A smug twink nestles on a pile of FULL COLOUR newspapers and the D-R-A-M-A DRAMA in Potch (not really) over halted student publication. – via Mail & Guardian

Vida e Caffe drops a nugget of pure douchery at the 2Oceansvibe office. – via Twitter

Lucas Sithole shows the Americans what a South African can do with a pair of balls! – via SA Breaking News

This just in: JuJu is not black jesus, Zola is! South Africa NEEDS him! – via Sowetan Live

Zapiro defends the gays and reads South African adoption agencies to FILTH! – via Mail & Guardian

Public Enterprises Minister, Malusi Gigaba, announces his “cluster-fuck-of-fuckery” plan to save national air carrier SAA. – via Times Live

Jeannie D takes her clavicles on a tour of Rome. – via Instagram

When misogyny and homophobia collide: Zuma congratulates Abbott. – via News24

CRISIS in Nelspruit as Radio Lowveld signal drops! – via Facebook

E-tolling is fucked before it even started…#DUH. – via Times Live