Today We Remember: Marius Roberts

Marius 1

Giving us early-90s-REALNESS above, is the younger version of ex-MNet continuity presenter, Marius Roberts.  Although still quite pleasant to look at, this is not the photo of him I wanted to use as the main image.  If your family purchased some of the more mainstream South African Sunday newspapers in the late 90s then you might recall an advert with Marius in nothing but his tighty-whities with his finger coyly on a water fountain (OBVIOUSLY) symbolizing all of our pussies erupting at the sight of his furry toned body! Sadly, I could not find this image anywhere on the internet.  If you have it, please send it to me so I can bust one out for old time’s sake!  If you were wondering, this is what Marius looks like today:

Marius 2

My god! Poor Marius. It’s like it’s him, but not him.  This looks like his identical twin who was given up for adoption to a family who who only fed their kids mieliepap and had no appreciation for skin-, hair-, or dental care.  It looks like they tracked him down (the twin), put him in the cheapest Marham suit and just started taking photos haphazardly! Yes, NO hair and makeup or one single sit-up was done before this shoot! NOT ONE!

According to Who’s Who: SA he is still working as a model for a Japanese modelling agency…oh well, maybe the Japanese are into this kind of thing…god knows it wont be the freakiest thing they’re into (although cranking it to THIS is pretty freaky).  If you would like to close your eyes, imagine him 10-20 years ago and listen to his cute lisp, then you can do so by tuning in to Ignition GT on DStv.  Or you could put that mess on in the background while you state at these (sadly, no shirtless ones:

Marius 3 Marius4 Marius5

 

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One Comment on “Today We Remember: Marius Roberts”

  1. Oh my frick! That’s some scary stuff right there


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