Daily Skid Marks

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Emo Adams makes thirsty bitches lose all ability to use human language. – via Twitter

How the FUCK is a drunk government official able to dodge police for two hours?? Regardless of how, this shit happened *files under fuckery*. – via Times Live

Haji Mohamed Dawjee throws piping hot shade at the Prez. – via Mail & Guardian

Jay du Plessis celebrates his birthday and Steve Hofmeyr does what he does best…digging in some random “koek”. – via Twitter

The UK cancels SA’s visa-free status and the ANC is working on a cunning plan to ‘get back at them’. Give me fucking strength. – via Times Live

Saying that South African union members need discipline is like saying I need a broad spectrum antibiotic every Monday morning, but Numsa’s general secretary disagrees. – via Times Live

South Africans fail yet another test… this time a test for happiness. Even fucking Kosovo and the Ukraine are happier than us! – via 2Oceansvibe

There is the strong stench of human excrement in the general Sandton area as Traders at the JSE collectively evacuated their bowels at the thought of all kinds of dumb whores now being able to trade shares. – via SA Breaking News

SA Ambassador to the UK, Dr Barend Delport’s, impressive collection of kiddy pussy pics make everyone proud. – via 2Oceansvibe

If Veet SA is unveiling their new spokesperson, WHERE is Dr Ream-me Short?? – via Twitter

Everyone at the Toronto Film Festival lost their shit over the film adaptation of Nelson Mandela’s Long Walk to Freedom. – via Mail & Guardian

The most overrated, underwhelming, overpriced and generally shitty expo will hit Johannesburg again from 26 – 29 September. – via Sexpo

And finally, Juanita du Plessis still hasn’t learned her lesson. – via Twitter

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