Today We Remember: James Small

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All you thirsty whores better appreciate this fucking post because in all probability it will be the reason this blog gets taken down. That’s because the only quality images of James Small I could find on the internet are owned by Gallo Images and I am NOT going to spend the money I earned giving handjobs on the Sea Point Promenade so you whores can have something to grease your crankshafts to. If you want this bad boy deliciousness without GALLO IMAGES plastered across his dick then you’ll have to go buy it yourself! Sadly, this former Springbok looks nothing like he did during the glory days when he was giving the Springbok Rugby team PR whores stomach ulcers and heart palpitations on a daily basis. These days, he looks like this:

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EISH! I don’t know who the trick sitting next to him is , but she looks about as excited to be in his company as that collagen in his skin (side note: she at least had the decency to stick around for a piccie…the collagen obviously took its shit and fucked off a LONG TIME ago). Imagine my shock when I read that he is only 44 years old! How the ENTIRE FUCK do you look this busted at 44? Did all the money from the underwear and adverts and key-chains and god-knows-what-else not not stretch to afford some moisturizer? Not only has his face clearly resigned from his body formally, but judging from this interview with everyone’s favourite racist, ex-radio presenter Darren Scott, his voice sounds like he’s been chain-smoking Pitchmark since his team’s 1995 World Cup victory:

I find this whole situation very sad. I distinctly remember having to hide my prepubescent boner from my parents when I saw the not-so-small Mr Small here on TV with the rest of the Springbok team around the time of the 1995 World Cup. They were all on an open double-decker bus touring some city and all of them were wearing suits. Everyone looked very smart, except of course James who was wearing a backwards cap…what a fucking rebel! What a fucking DISH! Now? …Not so much now. Look at Robert Downey Jr. Look at Brad Pitt. Apart from 2013-Brad needing a bit of a wash, they are still partying like rock stars and don’t look like THIS! You are letting your fellow South Africans down James! For now, let’s just remember what it used to be like (side note: I suddenly see where Peter Jackson got his inspiration for Gollum! See it? In the last picture? Christina Storm should be due some hectic royalties by now..):

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